Just Enough

I recognize my life still. Despite Mike's treatments, I have tried to maintain normalcy for our family between work, mealtimes, bedtimes, playdates, summer activities, chores. All the daily and weekly occurrences we all live with.  However, the low level of stress over time wears our family down and I lack my typical level of patience. My family sees it and I feel badly for not having more patience.

So I am giving up on the idea of perfect patience. I forgive myself for being snappy, short-tempered and hurried. I accept imperfect patience, an imperfect summer, and an imperfect world.  I look for solace in the moments where there is just enough patience and humor to clean sticky lemonade spills (again), laugh at my irrational behavior, and tuck the kids in at the end of a difficult day.

Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself.  Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instantly set about remedying them - every day begin the task anew. 

~ St. Francis de Sales

Mid-Summer Family Photo

Week 18

I had my fourth round of chemo and (on a sarcastic note) what fun that was. Just as I was getting my taste and hair back after surgery, it is quickly taken away again. On a brighter note, I only have two more rounds of chemo treatment and should be done around mid September. Since my last blog entry I found myself a little down and trying to process the diagnosis, treatments, and life after all this is done. I started focusing on what I do not control which inevitably puts me in the wrong mindset. After talking with a friend and thinking about what I do control, I think it's okay to be pissed off that I'm going through this up and down journey.